I have pulmonary hypertension and i knew pregnancy is not good for women in my condition i was told i had a 50% chance of survival amd it was medically recommended to terminate i have other children amd knew i would have to 3 days ago i went and had my procedure i dont remember anything till they woke me up right away i was balling and havent been able to stop i didmt know i would feel like this and i cant deal with it im not strong enough. What have i done. ???? My baby!!! Omg ill never forgive myself ever !! What of we survived?? Now im dead too anyways im so sorry. I cant handle feeling like this i was 10 weeks. I wanna die too omg my lil baby is gone.
At the age of 21 (we were married 1972) Our daughter was born June 1974. She was less than 6 mos. old -a COLIC baby when I was pregnant again- due Aug ‘75. On April 3 my had borrowed the $275 to take care of the procedure I have as hoping he would give the $ back and he was hoping I would change my mind He had dropped me off And when he returned… other than saying I had gone thru with it It was a quiet ride home … 😞 After Over 45 years I wonder – was that my son ? What would that person have become ? In 1980. God gave us another daughter and they have been told – funny how they said they always felt like someone was missing As a Believer I know I will see that 2nd child one day …. but there has and will continue to be that emptiness until then. I wish I could go back to Feb 3, 1975.
I am married. I have a one year old son. Abortion doesn’t fit this stereotype, right? Abortion doesn’t discriminate. I suffer from a condition called HG in Pregnancy. I get deathly ill. When I started projectile vomiting after having my morning coffee, I knew. In two weeks I was at the ER as I couldn’t get the sickness under control. I had no help with my son and my husband did not care. He didn’t wear condoms like I begged. Because of Covid, there was little help at the hospital. So, I ran to the nearest abortion clinic. I needed to end this sickness so I could get out of bed and take care of my toddler. As they printed the picture and I saw the heart rate, I cried, “I cannot do this.” I explained my reasons to the doctor that I didn’t want to die and my evil husband would raise our son. She nodded, I took the first pill. Two days later, I took the second set. No one told me I would be in so much pain, I begged God to die. It was like having a knife in my tummy for three hours. I screamed. This was a million times worse than contractions. I called the nurse line. They put me on hold 5 times. That’s how much they care. When I said I feel like I am dying, they said “that’s normal.” I passed out and eventually passed a gush of fluid. I regret this choice with every ounce of my soul. I should have begged for help. I should have used my paycheck to get a nanny. I will never know that baby. My son touched my tummy and looked at me with sadness. I did this for him, but I still feel like a monster.
I was “old enough to know better” when I had my abortion. I had one child, a beautiful daughter that was 7 years old when I had the abortion. I was in a serious relationship with my previous boyfriend, and he made it perfectly clear he did not want to have the baby. I was so scared to try and do this on my own, and even though I loved the baby, I did what he wanted rather than follow my own desire. I had to drive three hours away, by myself, and I was so scared. This was more than 15 years ago, and I’ve experienced nightmares and feeling the loss of my baby through many of those years. I was told repeatedly by those encouraging me to move forward with the abortion that it wasn’t really a baby. I know now that it was, and there were a lot of development features in place. I just didn’t want to see it. I was too worried about what my boyfriend thought, and cared less about protecting the baby. I’m incredibly ashamed about that today. I have consistent fears and shame that I deal with all the time, and I also believe I’ve experienced a lot of weight gain over the years because I equate being healthy and in shape with this traumatic experience. Or, I’m just trying to punish myself. If I could go back and change things, I wouldn’t have the abortion. I would have a child now that would be graduating from high school, and I know I could have managed somehow on my own. I think removing a child forcibly in that way does something to the mother that they cannot get over. I know that I cannot at least. Yes, as time goes on, I do not think of it nearly as much. But every year I remember it. All I can say is, I regret it deeply.
It’s been over 10 years since my abortion. I now have three beautiful boys. I look at them and wonder how did I get so blessed with them. I then wonder if my aborted child is watching me wondering why he wasn’t worthy. I pray to God that he opened his kingdom to my aborted baby. I pray I can give my eternal life for him to be in heaven if that means spending eternity in hell. I have no excuse at why this baby could not have a life on earth other than I was too selfish. Why did I have an abortion? I used poor judgement, and got myself pregnant. I was ashamed, and didn’t want to ruin my reputation should anyone find out. Why should that matter anyway, I think to myself now? My life wouldn’t have been ruined in all hindsight. I was 24, I knew better, I was grown. I had no intention of spending my life with the guy. I convinced myself this was the way to go, somehow fooling myself into thinking that if no one knows then it didn’t happen. But, it did happen and I think about it every day and all because I was too selfish to share my life with a baby. My heart is so full with my 3 boys, which just makes it hurt even more that I denied that from this child from the beginning. I also feel like I let my boys down as I won’t be waiting for them in heaven when all our times come. To anyone who reads this considering abortion, please please with all your heart, reconsider. For whatever justifiable reason you think you may have, the agony, pain and heartbreak will haunt you forever. Avoiding any type of shame or embarrassment hardly seems worth it for an eternity of regret and guilt. If you truly can’t keep your baby, adopt! It’ll be much easier living with yourself knowing you didn’t have to take your own baby’s life.
Hi my name is Trisha, before I was Trisha! I had another name! I was born in South Korea! I was a child out of wedlock! My biological father was abusing my biological mother. While she was pregnant with me! Couldn’t died then! Then she tried to have me aborted! Somehow I survived by God’s Grace and Protection! Due to their abuse, I have to live with seizures! But I am survivor and women of my faith and forgiveness! I have chosen to forgive both of them! Hope they found Grace and Love in Christ!
I thought I was doing the right thing with getting an abortion. I knew we didn’t have the time, money, or patience to raise a child and that I would be ruining my boyfriend’s life and that child’s life as well. I didn’t realize that it would effect me as much as it has. The unbearable guilt and regret of the abortion has destroyed me entirely. All of this pain and heartache is too much to live with. All I feel is am overwhelming empty sadness that won’t go away. I am so angry. I’m drowning in a deep dark hole of emotions I don’t understand. If I had known how overwhelmingly unbearable this pain would feel, I don’t know if I could have done it. I have always disliked children, never thought of having any of my own until I was pregnant and then everything changed. I wanted to keep it so badly, but I was so afraid and ashamed to admit it to myself and to him. I had always thought he didn’t want children as well and when we found out about the pregnancy besides asking if I was in shock the words out of his mouth was about abortion so I wrongly assumed that’s what he wanted. I never would have guessed that he wanted to keep it. He said it was my choice and that he would surport any decision I made. I thought I would be ruining his life had I kept it. I have to live with this horrible choice I made for the rest of my life. Even though the baby doesn’t exist anymore, it’s brief existence in my womb changed my life forever. It just hurts so bad to be alive like this. I don’t blame anyone, I did this to myself. It’s my fault, everything is my fault. If that little one didn’t deserve life neither do I. I have not been eating much lately because I deserve to feel empty. I am a void where things go to die. My baby would have been born sometime in April. I’m going to kill myself then if I don’t do that anytime before. I feel like I deserve to die, all I do is fuck up and hurt everyone. Everyday is like a nightmare progressing on.