On November 22, 2021 it will be 17 years to the day that I had my abortion at 17 years old. The baby’s father and I had been together for over a year when I found out I was pregnant in September 2004. We lived about 5 hours from each other at the time, so I had to share the news with him over the phone. We were both extremely scared and things were getting really bad between us. We were kids, in an extremely adult situation. He stopped talking to me in late October, my parents were on my back about getting an abortion and he agreed. It wasn’t something I wanted. I was working full-time, I was looking for a cheap apartment for me and my baby, preparing myself to be a single mother. Things didn’t work out. By mid November, I hadn’t found a place to live(because my mom wasn’t going to allow me to live with her) my job cut my hours, and my baby’s father still wouldn’t answer my calls. On the morning of November 22, 2004, I walked with my head low into the clinic that was about to terminate my pregnancy. I cried and begged my mother to let me stay and I was pleading with god to just let me keep this child. But nothing worked out the way I was hoping. The ultrasound showed the baby, and the heartbeat. I was wheeled into a cold room, where the sweet nurse looked at me with pity. She tried her hardest to make me comfortable given the circumstances. It was one of the most painful things physically and mentally I had to go through. I was angry and I still am.
I recently reconnected with my baby’s father who had shared with me how the abortion changed his life. I thought he had the easy way out and just walked away from me, the situation we were in and worst of all…his child. Turns out we both suffered horribly from that decision. It was not an easy road for him. I hated him for a long time because I thought he was just moving on while leaving me to pick up the pieces. Truth is..I never considered that he had a difficult time with this choice as well.
Parents are supposed to do anything possible to protect their babies, we couldn’t do that.
So before you decide to make this life altering decision, do your research of potential risks and side effects. Look into your options and decide what is right for you. Most importantly take care of your mind, body and soul. Don’t live in the same sadness and regret I do almost 17 years later.