Wish I could go back in time and undo what i did

I’m a 21 yr old mom of 2 beautiful babies, have been married for a 2 years now and on Jan 2021 I found out I was expecting my 3rd. Thinking about what others would think started popping up in my mind at least 5 times a day. I wasn’t too happy nor was I sad but I was willing to face it and try and enjoy my pregnancy without caring about what others had to say. Fast forward to February, things started getting a little dull with my partner since he had said a third child would just make it harder for us, specially since we’re so young and that’s when thoughts about abortion started hitting me. It breaks my heart and I’m crying as I write this. After he gave his thoughts and opinion, I scheduled and appointment to planned parenthood where I got the abortion pill and after that I have never been the same. I fell into a deep depression and tried a weed edible for the first time and had so much that I went into a full blown panic attack and thought my biggest fears had come true. Seeking God and reading the Bible have helped me a immensely but I wish I hadn’t gotten that abortion. Now I’m only left wondering what it would be like to have my baby and wondering what his/her little face would’ve looked like. If you’re seeking looking for a sign on this site this is it. DON’T DO IT, it will only intensify your pain.