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It’s been over 10 years since my abortion. I now have three beautiful boys. I look at them and wonder how did I get so blessed with them. I then wonder if my aborted child is watching me wondering why he wasn’t worthy. I pray to God that he opened his kingdom to my aborted baby. I pray I can give my eternal life for him to be in heaven if that means spending eternity in hell. I have no excuse at why this baby could not have a life on earth other than I was too selfish. Why did I have an abortion? I used poor judgement, and got myself pregnant. I was ashamed, and didn’t want to ruin my reputation should anyone find out. Why should that matter anyway, I think to myself now? My life wouldn’t have been ruined in all hindsight. I was 24, I knew better, I was grown. I had no intention of spending my life with the guy. I convinced myself this was the way to go, somehow fooling myself into thinking that if no one knows then it didn’t happen. But, it did happen and I think about it every day and all because I was too selfish to share my life with a baby. My heart is so full with my 3 boys, which just makes it hurt even more that I denied that from this child from the beginning. I also feel like I let my boys down as I won’t be waiting for them in heaven when all our times come. To anyone who reads this considering abortion, please please with all your heart, reconsider. For whatever justifiable reason you think you may have, the agony, pain and heartbreak will haunt you forever. Avoiding any type of shame or embarrassment hardly seems worth it for an eternity of regret and guilt. If you truly can’t keep your baby, adopt! It’ll be much easier living with yourself knowing you didn’t have to take your own baby’s life.

Hi my name is Trisha, before I was Trisha! I had another name! I was born in South Korea! I was a child out of wedlock! My biological father was abusing my biological mother. While she was pregnant with me! Couldn’t died then! Then she tried to have me aborted! Somehow I survived by God’s Grace and Protection! Due to their abuse, I have to live with seizures! But I am survivor and women of my faith and forgiveness! I have chosen to forgive both of them! Hope they found Grace and Love in Christ!

I thought I was doing the right thing with getting an abortion. I knew we didn’t have the time, money, or patience to raise a child and that I would be ruining my boyfriend’s life and that child’s life as well. I didn’t realize that it would effect me as much as it has. The unbearable guilt and regret of the abortion has destroyed me entirely. All of this pain and heartache is too much to live with. All I feel is am overwhelming empty sadness that won’t go away. I am so angry. I’m drowning in a deep dark hole of emotions I don’t understand. If I had known how overwhelmingly unbearable this pain would feel, I don’t know if I could have done it. I have always disliked children, never thought of having any of my own until I was pregnant and then everything changed. I wanted to keep it so badly, but I was so afraid and ashamed to admit it to myself and to him. I had always thought he didn’t want children as well and when we found out about the pregnancy besides asking if I was in shock the words out of his mouth was about abortion so I wrongly assumed that’s what he wanted. I never would have guessed that he wanted to keep it. He said it was my choice and that he would surport any decision I made. I thought I would be ruining his life had I kept it. I have to live with this horrible choice I made for the rest of my life. Even though the baby doesn’t exist anymore, it’s brief existence in my womb changed my life forever. It just hurts so bad to be alive like this. I don’t blame anyone, I did this to myself. It’s my fault, everything is my fault. If that little one didn’t deserve life neither do I. I have not been eating much lately because I deserve to feel empty. I am a void where things go to die. My baby would have been born sometime in April. I’m going to kill myself then if I don’t do that anytime before. I feel like I deserve to die, all I do is fuck up and hurt everyone. Everyday is like a nightmare progressing on.

I had an abortion when I was 18 years old my family made me do it then I prayed for another baby that same year I got the abortion and god blessed me with a daughter. 2019 I was trying to get pregnant nothing happened until I broke up with my ex in 2020 and got pregnant again I didn’t understand why I got pregnant I was depressed about it and got an abortion once I seen my baby in the toilet it hurted me so much I couldn’t sleep nor eat I told god during the abortion if it’s meant for this baby to go they will die and my baby died I couldn’t sleep or eat for days I miss my baby so much I wanna have kids but I wasn’t ready . Hopefully I’ll be pregnant again before my child turns 4 I’m praying and asking for forgiveness I didn’t have help during my pregnancy and I was lost and scared until it really hit me I won’t do an abortion again. I want my baby back I wish I was still pregnant with another twin that survived lord please bless me with another angel.

I think about it every day of what could have been. I made the difficult decision to abort at 5 weeks and was only 19 at the time. I was too afraid of birth control and chose vitamin C tablets as a natural remedy. I regret it so deeply but I take to babysitting and taking care of my nieces as a means to cope. I try to show the love I would have given to my own child to help with the pain. There are nights where I can not stop thinking about it, calling myself a murderer and a horrible person. I know that I am not that, I know that the decision was not easy and it comes with a lifelong lesson that I hope I can use in some way later down the road. You are not alone, you are not a monster. It doesn’t get easier but with the support of my close loved ones, it makes it easier. I wish I could share with more people I care about, but I know that they would not take well to it. I am thankful for what I do have.

I too was forced to have an abortion because the man said I got pregnant by didn’t want it I have never forgotten when I woke up from that and every year I ache for that child sometimes I forget all of a sudden I’m feeling it’s horrible hurt and I remember that was the mouth I killed my baby ,it has been 33years , please don’t kill your baby it will change your life forever plus it is a great Sin

I was young stupid and scared When I got pregnant; I knew someone that had an bortion, I thought that’s what you support. to do. I didn’t want to get in trouble I had no-one to talk or to try to stop me I made a decision and my boyfriend went along with it I know it hurt him to 😔 I will never forget the worst decision I made in my life. But God sent his only son Jesus to forgive our sins this is the only way I can find forgiveness through Jesus Christ please girls seek help talk to someone you can trust You are not alone. Now I understand! I’m so sorry to my child see you in heaven 🙏 😔